Monday, November 8, 2010

my mushy ramblings


love is not perfect.
er.
being in love doesn't mean everything is perfect. all the time.
i remember steve saying i read too many nicholas sparks books (like the notebook). that i had an expectation for a "perfect" love.

i dream. i do it in the most loveliest forms. my dreaming is fanciful.
the creativity runs wild. and i love it.
but it is not necessarily my expectations. perhaps when i was younger i thought it was possible. gullible. naive. a dreamer =]
and i still dream. its healthy and happy. but i have learned.
i have learned so very much.

we learn that the pure love of Christ is 100% selfless. charity.
"...pray unto the Father with all the energy of heart, that ye may be filled with this love, which he hath bestowed upon all who are true followers..." moroni 7:45

love is sacrifice.
it is learning to give.
love is something that develops not something you find all the sudden.
it is not perfect.
it is not always happy.
it is a willingness to work.

i was watching the wedding planner (with jlo. ridiculous right?) saturday night AND i learned something. or was reminded of something. I've blogged about arranged marriages before, and how our culture is different from others in this aspect. I feel that it is easy, and so many people believe in the wrong concept of love. It is misunderstood.

in the wedding planner, she learns about her parents having an arranged marriage and how they didn't really like each other at first. but when he was sick, she took care of him. they sacrificed for each other. the learned to like each other. then like turned to love. and it seems to forever be growing.

i know that in every relationship each person is imperfect. on top of that, the relationship will be imperfect. there are going to be bad times, hard times, disagreements, and lulls. are you willing to stick it out during those times? are you willing to sacrifice for that person? are they worth it to you? the storms will come. where will your roots be? will there be a stable foundation in the gospel? will you have developed strong communication? do you have the same goal in mind?

i took a picture on my phone of a quote i saw painted on a red wooden heart, "love gives you a fairytale".
i'm living my fairytale.
i really am. prettier than even my dreams painted.
and it's imperfect. and to me, that's what makes it so perfect.

he isn't a cookie cut of perfection. but darn, he's close.
it creates the opportunity to grow and progress and learn and become who i need to be.
and gosh, would it be boring if it was perfect.

i know that life will happen. trials and struggles and people will die. and for some reason i keep thinking i want him to be the one i tell all my fears to. the one i cry to. the friend i figure out how to create a life with despite the struggles.

and i feel like this is what love really is.
for the first time
i think i've felt it.

1 comment:

Jeannette said...

i so needed this. thank you:)