Wednesday, July 28, 2010

thats my life

of course he doesn't read my blog.
so he doesn't know how crummy it is to post that when i picked him up from the airport, he says "i don't feel for you the way you feel for me"


he's right next to me
"your hearts a million miles away"

the next day looked like this



and that is how i felt



everyone is sorry and i know all the advice and i know i will live
but once in a while i think i wont

i think i wouldnt mind if someone t boned my drivers side
as i ran i thought i dont even care if someone jumps out of a bush and attacks me
i think i just paid 20 bucks to have my car washed then it looks like there will be thunderstorms
my heart hurt
so i drove straight for the darkest part.
i stopped half way up a hill to stand on a rock and i cried
i sang a pretty song back in the car and sat at the top
i laid in the rain and tried to breathe
a deer hopped by
the clouds flew by
i took some photos and sat there for hours






nothing needs to be said
my girl friend brought me godiva cheesecake—things are already looking up

Thursday, July 22, 2010

a boy





i miss my danny j
he flew home to play with his best friend
he is the sweetest boy to me
and patient when i am a brat
and he tells me im good at things when im not that good
and he likes me with no make up and sweats (thank goodness)
and he always loves what i cook (partially because he would starve otherwise)
and he is funny
and i really love when he shakes his hands in the air because he is thinking in spanish
and i like his challenging questions because it provokes thought (not because i makes me fiery with rants)

i just like the kid

last night i couldn't sleep so i ate ice cream
and i studied different photographers and played through websites
fun
i have a lil struggle within myself for the time (p.s. my roommate just made me a multi-grain tortilla with peanut butter and strawberries. i <3 her)

struggle::i would really really love to go art school for photography. really bad. i would be on cloud 9. but i also want to go to PT school equally bad, i am really interested and want to keep learning more. i want to be an expert in the field and know more than anyone else on the face of the earth. thats stretching it. but really. i suppose i could do both. if i marry a rich man. or one that loves me enough to make school loan payments for the rest of our lives...meh. i guess i will see when i am done. before this year i had never wanted to grad school or any other education. but that has changed
and maybe in a year this will change again too

i just did P90X yoga and it rocks. i need to go shower before math (UGH)
can i tell you how much i hate math 1050?
i cried as i studied for my test last week, then welled up with tears during the test
terrrrible
but i got a 77% on it so i'll take that!
so much for staying on the deans list

good day

Monday, July 19, 2010

i wrote viva on the shower door

we went to vegas.
where it is 20 degrees above hades.
at this lavish hotel.
these are my friends burnt (but mostly me)
shes got model legs


the asian family was afraid of them
yes it was pretty
swan dive

he doesn't know what he's doing..
she lost ten bucks..

i found a rubber band in my 9 dollar onion soup
but we still had a good time.
not pictured is our bocce ball game that us ladies beat the boys
and the volleyball match in the sauna weather
and the stuffed french toast with hazelnut chocolate in the middle
and the jack in the box <3
and the $5 hotel water that zach opened
and the 3 hours spent at nordstroms sale
and the deep tissue massage by jay

the end

Monday, July 12, 2010

ladys things



sometimes i do this when i can't sleep.
i turned off my computer and lay in bed for a while and then decide if i write, i will sleep.
i found a new lady that i like..her photography that is.

my grammie sent me to this new place with a big bag full of bars of soap.
she is the lady that collects all the suave tubes from the hotels.
i hate bars of soap. but i decided to use them. and i love it all the sudden.
she included a bar of soap with the scent of her perfume. it is the shape of a heart even.
and everytime i wash i think of her.
and i think of her saying that she'll wash my mouth out with soap if i repeat something bad (though she never did..or i never repeated it—the spaghetti spoon on the other hand...=]) and i think of her telling me to keep my dirty hands off the walls
i love the smell inside of the china cabinet and the way her house is ALWAYS perfectly clean.
the candy dishes, the silhouette cut outs, the tiny grocery bag for the garbage.
i miss my gram
i have a photo to share but its dark, and its on my camera right now

its terribly hot and danny and i have become so frugal that we crashed a wedding during the last half hour to eat all their food.. the bride and groom were leaving as we were walking up...hahaa rude i know, but my danny knew the guy...=] thats life

we've become good at the "that's my life game"
we bought gourmet cookies for a long drive, i open them half way for a snack and my favorite one is in 13 tiny crumbles.... "thats my life man"
danny signs up for classes only to find out half way through the semester that those credits won't count...
i spend $15 on prenatal pills to make my hair possibly grow faster, and they're the size of my pinkie finger...
we wash our cars and suddenly in the middle of july it starts to pour...
i pay someone 50 bucks to paint my nails and an hour later they're chipped...
"that's my life!"

im learning to roll with the punches.
i miss my best friend.
i miss clean air.
when will my hair get longer?
my mind is trying to figure something out lately but i don't know why. it's using all my energy.
i've been sleeping a lot.

i really need a new list of solid goals. they need to be posted on my wall, and my journal, so i can regroup. this summer is easy enough. i started to read 3 books this summer but one i bet i'm going to love and quote it here. get ready. it is by stephen covey. oo im into these "be a better you" kinda books.
the end of such tangents.

oh and these are petty things. i'm whinning cuz i can't sleep.
im going to vegas next weekend!!
just cuz i can.

Sunday, July 11, 2010

.

that the name be not blotted out in your hearts

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

we went

monkey thing.



little tiny turtle that i made big.
crazy bird.
meditating snake.
16 foot tall giraffe.


to tha zoo
my danny loves the monkeys
and sometimes he looks like a monkey

and he plays like a monkey
it was way fun except there were no polar bears

my camera has been out and about a lot lately and this makes me happy.
im going to go run now and buy a new bed sham. 4th of july photos soon.

Friday, July 2, 2010

horray















danielle & seth will be married next summer in mexico
they're a natural couple that is great together and they have a cute lil wiener dog
horray! happy holiday weekend