Saturday, February 4, 2012

the space around me

in the premortal life, (life in the spirit world, before we came to earth)
we chose to come to Earth.

all of us did.
hitler did too.
and we knew it would be difficult. we knew we would be cut off from the presence of God. we knew some of us would rebel or get lost. but we also KNEW we had a Savior that covenanted to suffer for us, for our imperfections. so that one day, we could be cleansed and whole, that we may live with God again after this mortal life.

sometimes, when life gets hard, i like to think about what i thought in premortal life. did i look down ( in a very 3rd person scrooge-like state ) and laugh at all the dumb boys i've cried over? was i filled with joy seeing all the blessings i would receive and the sweet people i loved? did i mourn for the people that hurt and seemed lost? did i ever hesitate that i could really do this? that i could handle my obstacles and challenges?

what did my brother think? did he know that he would live a normal active life then at 24, loose it all? did he know he would sit in a bed 24 hours a day without communication? for years? did he say, put me in coach! i'm ready! i see why this must be.. did he know it, and STILL chose it? did he choose to come to earth knowing the way he would bless lives? lead me to the gospel? did he willingly sacrifice to learn, grow, receive a body, so that he could return to live with Heavenly Father again? because he loved him that much?

when i have those days when i think, i just can't do this.. i remember that i chose this.
i chose to come to earth. i chose to endure hard things so i could have even better things.
i am choosing to get the most out of it.

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