Wednesday, February 24, 2010

this is home

for now.
isn't it pretty?
this image doesn't quite do it justice.
its my favorite thing about utah-the mountains during sunset
and im well sure that they are lovely during sunrise-i just don't arise that early

conclusions of the day:
-working with cadavers gets easier (less crying, less anxiety attacks) but it also makes you a vegetarian
-debt makes college kids depressed and commit suicide (learned this in a presentation on financial advice for entrepreneurs...) and this is why i get so easily angered and irritated...not good
-running gets easier the more often you do it (im smart. collage student.)
-i absolutely love white chocolate truffles
-97% of people are lazy (learned this from various co-students today... and a lifetime of experience with americans...)
-my hair needs to be dyed badly, my skin gets super dried out here, and my posture isn't as good as it was last year...
-i need to write in and THEN CHECK my planner...
-i should be more patient (story of my life)

so before i go color my nails purple (and hopefully study...)
I need to spill some guts
some thoughts i've had this month..
I have a boyfriend that is incredibly knowledgeable about the gospel, he gets it on a great level, -which is the single most thing that attracted me to him-
but he also pushes questions and really makes you think about the gospel, the structure, the principles, the truthfulness of how things are interpreted.
for me, this provokes thought. i can't always answer his questions and we don't always agree, but it tests my perspective and certainly my testimony.

As i sat in church this past month, it being my 5 year mark from the day i was baptized into the
Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, I thought about what my testimony is today, and how it is different from where i was at my baptism. i know i bore my testimony at it, and i wrote it, so i am wondering where that paper is... anyway. i thought-my testimony really hasn't changed much. i've experienced more than i could imagine, or at times, wished for. I have had crazy challenges and trials, but i also have seen some of the sweetest blessings during this time. and i believe i see a lot of those blessings because of the perspective i have in response to my knowledge of the gospel. My testimony is still so simple, still so pure, but my experiences have just enriched it. made my testimony stronger, made my testimony stand with more pillars, more conviction, and more hope. my boyfriend asked me about my thoughts on evolution. pushed at what i really believe. most scientists don't believe there could be a god because they can't prove it. hard evidence is lacking, apparently. but honest, it has been proven. i see it often. I feel evidence of Him in my love for my family. I feel Him when i feel the warmth of the Holy Ghost. I see Him in the beauty of nature as im snowboarding. I know Him when i open the scriptures-just opening them. I know He is the creator as I study the complexity and perfect systems of the body. I see him as people change their lives, find happiness, and are given strength. I know He lives when i see a heart change from hard to soft, melt by His spirit and follow his path. I know He exists because my prayers are heard and answered. I know He lives because he has protected me, and lifted me up, and given me soo much. more than i deserve.

All these, and more, are evidence that he really does exist and lives.
perhaps scientists should open their eyes. proof is here.

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