twenty six.

26 things i have learned by my 26th birthday.

1/ that i was placed in my specific family on purpose by a loving Heavenly Father
2/ how to love myself.
3/ how important it is to forgive everyone. even if they are not sorry. grudges bring about nothing good.
4/ what it really means to 'lean not unto thine own understanding'
5/ you should be a good person despite what others say or do
6/ my sins and problems are only different from others', they are not better or worse people
7/ what i am passionate about
8/ we ought to respect others' agency, the way God has left us solely with ours.  i can not control anyone else, but me.  i can control how i feel and how i react to anything. "no one can hurt you without your consent."
9/ that my love language is words of affirmation (what a surprise.) and lack of this or abuse of this, hurts me the most.
10/ how to pray
11/ that i have a really personalized mission and purpose on this earth
12/ how to assess and correct posture
13/ how to handle grief
14/ that soccer is not the most important thing in life
15/ to seek first to understand, then to be understood
16/ i can always run farther or do another set more than what my mind tells me
17/ my self worth is not dependent on how much a man loves me, my weight on the scale, the size of my boobs, the decisions i made in the past, the fanciness of my clothes, what other people think if me, how much i can get done in a day, whether i have children or not, nor my decision to not go to grad school.
18/ that no matter how far we feel like we are, no matter what bad things we've done, no matter what anyone else did to us-- we can ALWAYS turn to the Savior, who waits with open arms, and find joy
19/ you can't change the fruit without changing the root
20/ happiness is a choice
21/ most relationship difficulties are rooted in unclear/unexpressed expectations of roles and goals
22/ there is a definite difference between infatuation and love, and satan will continuously tempt us with infatuations.  infatuations or lust are unrealistic ideas of what someone is, what something will be like, or what you are seeing.  and it is worthy every effort to choose love over infatuation
23/ even though im a big kid now, its healthy to still dream
24/ love is a verb. action. it is a choice.  it is what we choose after the initial "head over heels" obsession.  it is discovering how someone feels and accepts love, then selflessly showing that to them every day.   it is making sacrifices for that person, really hearing them, and even giving them the freedom of agency—to develop themselves as an individual.  it is to know all the dark secrets and faults, and forgiving despite it all.  we are to love everyone. our selves, our enemies, our companions. and above all, we are commanded to love our God.
25/ only the disciplined are truly free.
26/ im only Gods hands.  im here to develop like Him.  to learn and grow, so i can help others. i have learned that i am given people, and trials, and my family, and opportunities so I can be molded into a spectacular woman.  i have power to create a life dedicated to happiness, light, truth, learning, loving, improving, and teaching.  i am not here for just me to enjoy, but i am here to serve Him and help his children find joy as well.

and i am grateful to recognize and learn these things over the past 25 years.  im thankful for everyone and every relationship and every experience that taught me.  26 is finding me at a turning point with many new things to learn and work on.  and im excited for it.
life is so good.
cheers!