he will be better than the best ive seen

i yearn for a family. im not crying sad about it any more.

im ok with what i have right now.

but i dream of my own.

i wish for a husband to serve and to follow.

for someone to cook dinners for. for a priesthood holder that desires to obediently serve the Lord not for any other reason than that he understands the truth about the gospel.

i dream of quiet talks before sleep.

for open communication, trust, and honesty from each other. for him looking hot mowing the lawn. for him to show respect for me as an example to the kids, to show his love. for love notes when he's not expecting it. for his desire to improve. for being a positive father and example to my babies.

i wish for a home to create.

for warmth and the sweet feeling of the Spirit always. for checker flooring. for clean sheets. for gentle tones, laughter shared, and inspiration between those walls. for new traditions, our own life, and support when life gets hard. big sunday dinners, kids dirty soccer jerseys, and decorations. i wish for children to teach. to give them freedom to dream. to give them the best chance at happiness as possible by sharing the gospel with them. i dream of us creating a safe haven from the world.

i wish to share my testimony often. to prepare myself to be this mother and wife i aspire to be by improving my weaknesses now. i wish to be nonjudgmental, loving, tender, and thoughtful as this woman. i wish to gain as much knowledge as i can so i can teach my babies. i wish to always improve and grow. i wish to one day serve a mission with my husband. i wish for many things.

for now, i must sleep.