hey mom

this is my front yard.

i like to go for runs-as im trodding along i pass several farms and ranches. one of them looks like a 2 million dollar ranch (home) and a couple acres of land. it is absolutely gorgeous. but this flock of cows apparently hibernate during the winter because i never even knew they existed (although i could smell them from time to time) until about a month ago.

sometimes in the middle of the night i am startled awake by the sound of one of them moo0ooo0-ing. so weird.

here's mah new hairdo.

the best is when people come up to me-saying that they love the new color-then (with a funny face) say they really did not like the blonde at all. it still is a mean thing to say even if it doesn't exist any more...haha

those are just pretty.

i'm almost done with my new website and im super stoked. I think it will be ready by this weekend. my next task is to design more business cards cause i'm almost out! =] eventually this blog is going to move to something more photo-friendly..

here's a funny thought from an earlier day:

most days-i have it SO figured out. i think i got it all going in the right direction. then this moment comes around when i realize im seriously bluffing it. I don't know what i am or who im suppose to be. i don't really know what i like and what i hate. it's all subject to change. i'm just making it all up. the improv life. where i can't make up my mind. honest. i don't really know what i want, and when i say that i don't really know what i mean.

i just ate a whole bag of dried mangoes. alone.

and it was real good.

i have a sugar problem

and a mango problem

my pasta water is boiling over..

happy day

at 3 am last night,

i still wasn't asleep

i craved pie, fruit pie

with sugary crust

i dreamt

i don't understand how we can have such strong feelings in dreams

dreams are really weird concept

a movie or clips, a pretty soundtrack your subconscious festers up

maybe i would like to study the topic

this photo was from a really sad day i was having.

and i call it happy day flowers even though it was more of a tree...

i've decided that i hate the routine of life and the urge for everyone to try to fit into some category.

i ate the most wonderful sourdough toast this morning while chatting with my best friend and now im going to go curl my hair

mr and mrs hilliker

i think i cried 4 times at this wedding...super sweet and genuine. this is what true love looks like.

shots in the foot

i use to have anxiety attacks every time someone, particularly my ex husband, would sit on my off white suede (that IS spelled correctly..weird) couch cover. I would panic that it would get stained and wrinkled, like i couldn't replace it for 30 bucks... my apartment in long beach was only 500 sq feet. just enough space for His life size arcade game and a bed. THUS sitting on the couch was the only option...but still i always freaked out about it. i bet i will die younger over the kind of stress i put my body under. such a stupid and silly thing to even think about.

i really regret being like that and it still bothers me years later.

my password to anything is the exact same thing with a different boyfriends name plugged in for the appropriate "registration" period.

i love not wearing make up because i can wipe my eyes as much as i want with freedom and relief. and because my danny says im pretty like that

i always feel sad when a chuck palanuik book is over. especially half way through a flight when i have nothing else to do..

i just decided that i really want to run away today. i don't even care where and i don't even care about taking anything except my camera and a book.

i wished my retainer didn't hurt so much to wear at night. i'm tired of dreams of babies. and it's time for me to get a drink of water.

lots of photos to come soon. soon. when my computer starts being friends with me again.